Carolyn Diane Hogan Behr finished her race and got her angel wings on Saturday, October 26, 2024, surrounded by her devoted family.
Born on September 19, 1937 in Cedar Rapids, Iowa, to Irish Catholic parents Marge and Bill Hogan, Carolyn was the second of six siblings. The Hogan household was a vibrant tapestry woven with faith, family, and fun, instilling in their children a deep connection to God. She spent twelve years at St. Patrick’s School, excelling in basketball, bowling, tennis, and she even did a little modeling during her teen years.
At an early age Carolyn had a sense of adventure. Like a bird eager to spread her wings, at 18 yrs old, she and two friends set off on a road trip to Florida. On their way they stopped in New Orleans, where their car was stolen along with their belongings. Soon the car was found, minus the luggage, and they continued their journey to Daytona Beach. The girls had loads of fun and safely returned to Iowa with no arrest warrants.
At age 23, Carolyn returned to Florida, leaving behind an unwanted engagement, and accepted a transfer as an executive secretary in Orlando, ready to chart a new course in her life.
A cradle Catholic, Carolyn, who loved wearing big beautiful hats, attended mass at Saint James Cathedral, where fate intervened. Tom Behr, was serving as an usher and caught sight of her. After mass he spotted her hat as he saw her drive away in front of him. At a dinner party later that night, his friends commented on why he didn’t have a date. He then recounted seeing a beautiful woman in a big hat at church and that she had driven away in a Red Ford Falcon. He remembered she had an Iowa tag (and for some reason her tag number stuck in his head). One of the strangers at the party happened to be a detective and offered to help him get her contact information. Tom nervously called her asking for a date the next day. After three attempts Carolyn finally relented, leading to a four-hour coffee date at Ronnie’s that ignited their romance. They married the next year in Iowa on September 22, 1962, beginning a beautiful journey together.
Settling back in Florida, they bought their cherished lake home on Howard Drive shortly after welcoming their first child, Bill, in 1963. They attended St. James and later became devoted parishioners of St. Margaret Mary. Carolyn spent many hours being a play-ground mom, helping watch over the other students at St MM and substitute taught religion class there.
Carolyn & Tom’s lives transformed in 1973 when they attended their first Cursillo retreat weekend, deepening their faith and forging lasting spiritual friendships. By 1978, they were the first couple to lead the COR retreat at Camp San Pedro. They worked many retreats over the ensuing years and became affectionately dubbed “Mama and Papa Behr” by the young people they taught, loved & inspired.
The Behr home became a gathering place for deep conversations, and for fun, with food always being served. The door was never locked, or if it was you all knew where the key was (behind the bench). Mama and Papa Behr began the legendary Annual Thanksgiving Bloody Mary party in 1978 (we think?) which carried on for close to two decades. Dad’s bloody mary’s were famously made in huge soup pots, with plenty of vodka, tabasco, horseradish, Mr. & Mrs. T’s Mix, then garnished with celery (to make it healthy!). Dad would give visitors To Go bottles to take home. Many pregnancies, engagements and other life events were often announced at this yearly gathering; however, Carolyn was ready to sunset this annual event the year she had her 5th hip surgery.
Despite enduring the pain of arthritic hips for over 50 years, Carolyn remained a beacon of joy and adventure. Whether at the beach or the Cady Way Swim Club, she loved to play with us, teaching us tennis, challenging (and usually beating) us at card games (just like Grandma Hogan). We lost most of the Spite & Malice card games because Grandma’s Iowa Rules seemed to pop up when we least expected. Mom persevered through seven hip surgeries, refusing to be held back from parasailing, hang-gliding, and even hot-air ballooning, and just a few years ago, she finally rode a recumbent Catrike, proving her spirit was unstoppable.
Since 1967, Carolyn and Tom relished summers in Maggie Valley, North Carolina, where they found a welcoming Catholic community at St. Margaret of Scotland. Carolyn made retreats there and felt her faith expand in the beauty of the mountains. They bought and remodeled a cabin in 1988, creating a sanctuary filled with love. They welcomed extended family and friends there often over the years. Just like Howard Drive, the door was always open. After Papa Behr died in 2006, Mom took refuge there. At the cabin, she played cards, did puzzles, wrote in her journals, had extra special visits with her siblings. There she found joy in the quiet moments with the Lord. One of our fondest memories was celebrating 80th birthday party there, with just us four kids.
Carolyn had a decades long practice of meeting God each morning, starting when we were just little kids. She called it Quiet Time. She got up before dawn, reading God’s Word, copying down prayers and curating her own concordance of meaningful words from her well-loved & very highlighted bible, deepening her understanding of Love.
This is why we felt her love. She channeled Christ’s love to us and to all she encountered. She led by example and by doing so, became a great teacher to us kids in our own journey of faith. Carolyn also made a difference in the lives of others serving as volunteer coordinator at BETA house for many many years. Later in life, after the kids were out of the house, she became a realtor, even making the million dollar club one year. Being a realtor meant she didn’t have to sneak into empty homes to view them 😉
Following Tom’s passing in 2006, Carolyn found a cozy condo in Maitland, where she lived for nine years before moving to Westminster Towers. She loved the Towers. She forged new friendships and earned a reputation for fun, playing bridge and mahjong, and volunteering on various committees.
Family was always at the heart of Mama Behr’s life. Her deep bonds with her sisters and the cherished trips they took together brought her immense joy.
Mom loved being a grandmother! She was affectionately renamed “Noni” by her grandchildren. She earned the campfire name “Noni Good Pie” at a nocturnal Behr gathering (…. why? Because she made AMAZINGLY GOOD PIES !!! 🙂 She built close loving relationships with her grandchildren, and with her nieces and nephews.
You all might have benefited from Mama Behr’s infamous greeting card ministry which ensured that no special occasion went unnoticed, spreading warmth and love to her family and friends.
Carolyn was preceded in death by her parents, and her brother Stephen Hogan, and by her husband Tom. She is survived by her children, Bill Behr, Heidi Behr (Mark Egeland), Lisa Behr, and PJ Behr (Lori) and three grandchildren, Breanna, Wade, and Tiffany, as well as Carolyn’s beloved sisters, Laurie Davis, Nancy Hogan Baur, and Charlotte Hogan, brother Scott Hogan, as well as numerous loving nieces and nephews.